1 in 4 women will be victims of domestic violence in their lifetime. I am one of those women. I am the silent voice of domestic abuse. I am a survivor. Every minute 24 people become victims of domestic violence. When you start looking at the numbers and start putting faces and names to the statistics it’s mind boggling. This has to end. It’s time to speak out and say #NoMore. That is why the NFL has partnered with The Joyful Hearts Foundation, Nomore.org, and the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.
For many years I did what domestic violence victims do, I suffered in silence. Even after leaving my abuser I was still silent because I was embarrassed and ashamed because I was “dumb enough” to allow myself to be victimized. I was ashamed because I thought some how it must be my fault. Many victims of domestic violence suffer in silence. Many are afraid of what their attackers will do to them or their loved ones if they seek help. Oftentimes victims need you to hear what they can’t say. Current and former NFL Players are proud to be the voice for so many who have been rendered speechless by violence. It’s time to stop saying “we don’t talk about that”. It’s time to stop asking, “why doesn’t she just leave?” The time has come to say enough is enough #nomore
I have heard people say oh she probably deserved it. Maybe he was stressed out, maybe she was talking back. He is such a nice a guy I’m sure there is a reason. It’s alarming how easily our society justifies domestic violence. It always amazes me when I hear people discussing domestic violence and putting the blame on the victim. I don’t understand how it’s the victim’s fault they have been assaulted, bullied and mentally and sometimes sexually victimized. Without fail when I say I am one of those women; I was beaten. Is it my fault; am I to blame for my ex husband’s actions? When people who know me find out they are outraged. They are sympathetic, which infuriates me why do I deserve your sympathy while another women you don’t know is blamed and criticized? When I ask people what would you do if I was one of those women many are quick to declare it would never happen to you because you’re strong. I would help you, I would know and I would get you out. An uncomfortable silence always falls over the room when I tell them I wasn’t strong enough, not for a long time. You didn’t see it, you didn’t help and you didn’t save me or keep me safe I had to do that for myself. Stories like mine and thousands of others that will go untold is why the NFL’s #Nomore campaign is so important. Often by the time you realize the woman in the office next to you, the lady that sits on the pew at church, or your son’s favorite teacher is one of the 1 in 4 women you pass daily who is a victim of domestic violence it maybe too late. Most of the time you only know when she has been beaten so badly she has no choice but to drag herself to the ER because no amount of foundation will cover the bruises. Maybe you won’t find out until the coroner is at her door taking her abuser’s body away in a hearse because she killed him instead of subjecting herself to one more punch. Maybe you’ll find out when the police and media and the coroner converge on her front yard to take her abuser jail while her cold lifeless body heads to the morgue and her children are standing there confused and lost. Maybe we should make the culture of domestic violence intolerable. Maybe we should say #nomore maybe we should talk about it and start the conversation because maybe just maybe the woman you admire, the woman you would least suspect is also a silent victim living a nightmare and surviving just to fight again another day. Maybe someone you love is one of those women desperately trying to find a way to say #NOMORE.
In the graphic below 22 NFL players are pictured at the line of scrimmage. The skulls represent 1 woman who has been a victim of domestic violence. The lighting bolt equals half of a person. What if one of those women was your daughter, your sister, or your mother? What if you were one of those women? Isn’t it time we did all we can to end domestic violence? #NOMORE
Help us start the conversation. Go to www.nomore.org you can share your story, or make a donation to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. You can also download the sign. To show your support for #nomore download the sign and change your profile pic on social media.
This post is a class assignment. The digital media and photographs are part of the NFL’s #Nomore campaign. My testimony however is true. I was one of the people without a voice, I was one of the nameless, faceless victims until I found the courage to say #nomore
Bellmyer, J. (2014, November 13). No More’ campaign takes residence at Rising Sun town hall. Retrieved December 6, 2015, from cecildaily.com:
Foundation, J. H. (2014, October 22). NFL Players Say NO MORE :60 . Retrieved December 6, 2015, from Youtube.com:
Kolban, J. (2015, January 2). The Team Behind the N.F.L.’s ‘No More’ Campaign. Retrieved December 6, 2015, from nytimes.com:
More, N. (2015, January 26). Listen: 60 (NO MORE’s Official Super Bowl 49 Ad) . Retrieved December 6, 2015, from youtube.com:
No more. (2014, December). Retrieved December 6, 2015 , from nomore.org: https://pbs.twimg.com/media/B3gCa-sCAAAMuxU.png
No more why doesn’t she leave. (2014, October). Retrieved December 6, 2015, from joyfullheartfoundation.org:
nomore.org. (2014, October). No more . Retrieved December 6, 2015, from ncdsv.org: http://www.ncdsv.org/publications_NoMore.html