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A Fool for Love

Sorry, I don't have an April Fool's Prank for you. Instead I thought I'd share 4 foolish mistakes I've made in the game of love. No, I don't think I'm the love guru, (knowing me, I will probably commit a love violation before you finish reading this,) but I have learned enough not to repeat …

Sorry, I don’t have an April Fool’s Prank for you. Instead I thought I’d share 4 foolish mistakes I’ve made in the game of love. No, I don’t think I’m the love guru, (knowing me, I will probably commit a love violation before you finish reading this,) but I have learned enough not to repeat these foolish mistakes.
1. If you are the only 1 putting in stop going dutch.

Relationships are give and take 50 -50. If you are always giving then grab some me time and rethink this situation. Old sayings become old sayings because they are true. “You can bad by yourself.” If they aren’t bringing anything to the table but a pretty/handsome face move the table. While you are going emotionally, physically, financially bankrupt you’re missing out on someone who would not only bring a plate to the table, but they’d help you cook, and wash dishes too.

2. It’s a bad sign if you have to be a chameleon for them to love you

If you have to change who you are to be with them odds are 99 to 1 they are not the 1 for you. I have had the misfortune of waking up in a relationship only to find myself wondering how the hell I ended up in a Twilight Zone episode. When you hear yourself saying things that don’t sound like you don’t make excuses correct the problem. If you are doing things that you don’t do, you don’t want to do, etc take the off ramp at the flashing red flag and get off the ride. It’s not a good look and it never works. Sooner or later the other person is going to want to be with a person not a puppet.

3. Remember it ended for a reason – don’t go back.

 This is my Achilles heel. Please learn from my mistakes. This one will do serious damage. Memory Lane is only good when it’s a song sung by Minnie Ripperton. Reunited sounds like a great way to go when Peaches and Herb are going on about it, but it’s not. This theory  always sounds good in song. It is very rare the concept works in life. In my lifetime I’ve only seen it work once. Hence my great desire to make it work for me. It doesn’t work. Those same annoying habits that bothered you before only get worse as you get older. Even if you are only 3 weeks older. Old relationships are like trash – would you bring the trash back in after you set it out on the curb?

4. Know your worth.

That seems kind of simple but it really isn’t. Sometimes we put a little more value on ourselves than we should. Sometimes we don’t give ourselves enough credit. In short, if you know you are a 5 get out of the 10 section. Stay in your lane until you are really an 8 or higher. If you are bona-fide 10 stop picking up these fixer uppers. You can’t turn a 3 into a 10. There is a reason why couples should  be equally yoked.

Hope your April Fools Day was full of joy and laughter and light on the tomfoolery. Peace Love and Styles.

There is a difference between making a mistake and  playing the fool as a recurring role.

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Karintha Styles

Karintha Styles

Veteran sports and entertainment journalist, Karintha Styles holds court at the intersection of sports and pop culture. Seamlessly she weaves common sense, tough love, and quick wit through her writing and commentary.Currently, she hosts Week N Sports and Styles & Kaikai with Elizabeth Kaikai.You can find the Detroit native’s work on numerous media outlets including Fox Sports, Yahoo Sports, BET, iHeart Media, and Hoops Habit.

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